Excerpt #3 (Something Sad)

JOSH’s POV

I awake to the smell of coconut and vanilla across my face. I smile because I can imagine waking up to her hair in my face every morning. I take this moment to study her features to memory—the way she breathes, the little freckle that is next to one of her eyes. She looks like an angel—my angel. I study the soft curve of her nose, the little dip in her lips, and how her hair covers her face and my pillow. I watch her sleep and imagine a future where we wake up like this each morning.

“So, how long will you be gone?” she asks in a soft voice. We’re sitting at our spot by the lake the following day. Later, we’ll be moving her into her new apartment with Emily, and then we have a few weeks together before everything changes.

“Two weeks and then I’ll come back for a week.” She’s sitting between my legs against my chest. I can feel every breath of air she intakes.

“I’m going to miss you, but I know we can do this.” She says more to herself than to me. She turns suddenly to face me, sitting on her knees, looking down at her hands in her lap.

I guide her chin up with my fingers. “What is it?”

She sighs softly, and her eyes bounce back and forth between my own. “I’m just so sorry that I stole so many moments from us. We could have had so many years together if I just had believed enough. I feel like I’ve just finally started living, and now you’re leaving. I...I promise to be strong, Josh. It’s always been you for me.”

My chest hurts—like it’s strangling my heart and robbing me of air. I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to be away from her. I feel like I’ve just started living as well—living with her. She is the reason why I live. “Riley, I love you. I’ve always loved you. We may not have been together the way I wanted all those years, but I remember every fucking moment we’ve ever shared. There have been moments that I cherished that you may not even have known I grabbed. I’ll come back to you. I promise.” I tuck her hair behind her ear, and when I trail my finger down her neck, she shuts her eyes breathing shallowly. I love that her skin covers in goose bumps when I touch her.

I lean forward, closing the distance between us as I kiss the corner of her mouth. She inhales deeply. I cup her cheeks and then press my lips to hers, not opening my mouth. We just stay like that for a beat before she parts her lips slowly, and her tongue very so softly touches my lips. That’s all it took for our kiss to become the kiss that has sealed my fate—I am hers. I will never belong to anyone but her. 
© Copyright 2014 by Andrea Michelle.